fifty shades of facebook memes…

Let’s talk about Fifty Shades of Grey, consent, the difference between fiction and reality, and also the fallacy of false equivalence.

We’ve all seen this floating around by now, right?

The watermark attributes it to the facebook group Rowdy Conservatives, it first showed up after the clip was leaked of the (now) president saying he grabs women by the pussy, and clearly it was meant to rile. But it’s vile, based on a fallacious argument, and basically garbage.

Let’s chat about why…

The most obvious issue here is that Fifty Shades of Grey is fiction. It didn’t really happen. None of the characters are real. Everyone in the book was entirely made up. Contrast that with Donald Trump, a very real man, speaking about grabbing, and kissing very real women. To equivocate the two is annoying, at best.

Next, FSoG was entirely consensual. Two adults decided together that this was the relationship they wanted. Nobody was grabbing anything without permission. Whereas DJT didn’t ask at all. The whole point of his bragadocious comment was that when you are rich, famous, and powerful you don’t have to ask. Pop in a breath mint and just kiss away!

Here’s the deal, if, at this point, you still think women are upset by the word pussy, and not the “grab them by the” then I don’t know what to say. But please know this: Being non-consensually grabbed by the genitals, and choosing to read a book about a fictional guy who has consent to grab a fictional girl wherever he wants, are two entirely different things. Comparing them is in no way beneficial, and, honestly, it’s incredibly harmful. Telling a woman that because she read Fifty Shades she has to be cool with a man using his power to “move on her like a bitch” (full quote below) is irresponsible, and callous.

Maybe it’s time to stop justifying abuse, or maybe it’s time for you to admit you’re fine with women being assaulted. I think it’s time to recognize the difference between reality, and a book, and then empathize with victims, and those who advocate for them, instead of smugly telling them that their choice in literature makes their opinions obsolete.


I moved on her like a bitch, but I couldn’t get there. And she was married.”


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